The Aftermath (and I flunked math)

This is going to come as absolutely no news to anyone, but man… that was the antithesis of fun.

We should start with us losing power at about 7:00pm, long before any wind or rain showed up. Now, I must admit: the power came back, and stayed until the time I predicted it would vanish, at about midnight, just as the first official winds were starting to batter Galveston Island.

As I think I mentioned, this was my first hurricane since Alicia, back in ’83, and I could easily go another 25 years without another one. In ’83, I didn’t have a family, and trying to be a calm, strong influence in the noisy dark is… a little wearing. I’m not sure if I’m good at that, but I tried.

My new battery-powered radio worked like a champ. I had used the time with power to tune in a TV simulcast for Channel 11, which had gone into DOOOOM overdrive several days before (My wife and her best pal Ronnie the Crazy Cat Lady are still pissed at Big Brother being pre-empted Thursday night). This was the only to track the storm’s progress, and I was glad to have it, and all schadenfreude was put on hold whenever KHOU or the radio station took a hit to their power, and I had to find another station.

About 2am we had the first of the Noises, with a capital N. That was the siding being ripped off the side of my house and tumbling over the roof.

The storm had shifted enough to the east that we never saw the eye, and we were on what is euphemistically referred to as the “clean” side of the hurricane. The only clue we had that the eye was passing to our east was the change of direction in the wind.

At about 4:30, we had the second noise. We didn’t know it at the time, but that was a giant hand reaching down from the heavens and applying a purple nurple to the large chinaberry tree in our back yard. The poor thing shattered, and missed our house by literal inches. In fact, leaves from one of the upper boughs were pressed against one of our windows.

Our neighbors didn’t do so well. The tree took out their satellite dish, and the offending branch is still on their roof. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

As the sun came out, Ike was winding down in my part of the world. Ronnie – who is our neighbor – came over to check on us. I looked out our back window and went Damn…. And I eventually crawled into bed at almost 8am and drifted into exhausted sleep in our stifling bedroom.

That was interrupted – as it would be interrupted several times throughout the day – by people banging on the door to check on us and oooh and aaah at our shattered tree. We had the dubious honor of having the most damaged tree in our neighborhood.

Lisa went to check on the private school she runs and, miracle of miracles, it had power. We moved in, with Ronnie in tow, and microwaved some thawing TV dinners and watched a couple of movies that had nothing to do with hurricanes. I got a few hours of sleep… but was awake when another rainstorm came through at about 4:30am, killing the power there, too, and confirming my suspicions that God hates me. No, that confirmation actually came through at 4:45, when I was in the bathroom and my Mini-Mag-Lite’s bulb gave up the ghost.

After the rain let up, about 10:00am, we went back to our houses and started to clean up. It was the first time I had a chance to actually contemplate the fallen tree.

Here’s the same picture with my bulk added for scale:

After three hours with my cutters, bow saw and a borrowed chainsaw that gave up the ghost rather than deal with anymore of this, I was forced to give up. This was way above my abilities, even if I were a younger man with an uninjured back and legs and no health problems.


That was a hell of a blow to an already bruised ego. But I have to be rational about this: I could keep on whacking at it, but it wouldn’t be safe. This is no time for enthusiastic amateurs.

So we took showers – thankfully, the water pressure remained constant here in the hinterlands – and returned to the school, where the industrial-grade insulation stood a better chance of retaining some cool from the previous evening’s air conditioning. There was some recovery evident: about half the traffic lights were working, and some businesses on the main drag had power. Anything with food prep abilities were doing great business, including my beloved Tornado Burger. I didn’t even order the Spicy Burger, I was so happy. After 36 hours of Pop Tarts and Doritos, this was, and I do not exaggerate, heavenly.

As we sat out front of the school, enjoying the cool front that had pushed that early morning rain ahead of it (a small mercy shown to a city without power)… the power suddenly came back. Max was overjoyed to discover that cable and Internet had returned, too. (I may have to reconsider this whole grudge-holding Deity thing) The school uses Comcast for such things, and their phones, too, which was a blessing, as regular phone service and cell service had been nonexistent for some time. I had managed to send out some text messages, but it’s not the same as hearing voices.

I didn’t have much choice, I actually managed to sleep six hours, almost straight through – a near record for me, lately. Power was restored back at the house at about Noon on Monday, and we moved back, and started cleaning out the spoiled food in the refrigerator. Some of the meat in the freezer was actually still half-frozen and we went into an orgy of cooking.

About this time, I started shaking uncontrollably; the last few days had finally caught up with me. We checked my sugars, and they were normal, but the blood pressure… ah, jeez. I was riding for a stroke. I was ordered to bed, and I wasn’t about to argue. Stitches were creeping up my side, and I recognized the early signs of bronchitis. Just what we needed.

So here I sit, on Tuesday morning. I feel somewhat better. We await the call from our insurance adjuster, I have actually taken the plunge and gotten a Facebook account, since it’s very hard for me to reconcile my geek cred with a most un-geeklike wife who has a Facebook page and a Crackberry, while I just have a Bluetooth headset and a Nintendo DS. The world is totally out of whack, and I expect to see Rod Serling smoking a cigarette in the corner at any moment.

Well, that was my weekend. How are things in your town?

Look! In the Trees! It’s Coming!

So my usual four hours of sleep got chopped down to three. Man, you’d think I was worried about something.

The sun is rising. Amazingly, the city trash pickup just happened, and I’m glad I was optimist/dick enough to put out the garbage. According to HurricaneTrack.com, there is already some wave and water rising action in Galveston.

Ike strengthened a little overnight, but is still a Category 2 hurricane.

Last night, I watched 102 Minutes that Changed America on the History Channel, which edited together 9/11 footage from a variety of video sources. I only intended to watch a bit of it, but wound up getting sucked in for the whole ride.

The really awful thing is I kept thinking “Yeah, Cloverfield got that right.”

Things still to do: Patch that loose siding. Gather up all potential projectiles and lock them away. Fill up some more water containers. Take some photos. And get some damned sleep.

Batten Down the Hatches, Ar.

Man, that’s a big storm.

As I write this, what are referred to as the A and B Zones in the Gulf Coast region are evacuating in advance of Hurricane Ike making landfall late Friday, early Saturday. Seems that while I got usual four hours of fitful sleep last night, Ike shifted its path northward yet again, and unless it does so some more, I’m going to be getting some eye action this weekend.

Spent the early morning trimming off some branches (a project I started Labor Day weekend, but abandoned when my @#$%! cheapass bypass trimmer snapped), filled some containers with water. Most of my other shopping was done weeks ago. A new radio, batteries and even one of those shake-it-up-and-down-powered flashlights sit by my desk.

This will be my fifth hurricane to ride out; considering the nearly five decades spent living near the Gulf Coast, that’s not too bad. In two of those, I didn’t even lose power, but 50% ain’t great odds. So I’m likely going to be losing my ability to watch crappy movies, cheat at video games, and grouse on the Internets.

I guess the local media is breathing a sigh of relief; at least this time they can’t be accused of fearmongering, nor will some poor correspondent, sweating in their rain gear, be filmed desperately stating that they heard about some flooding maybe five or six streets over, though there’s not any rain where they are… at the moment. Back to you, Bob.

See you on the other side.

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Now playing: Holy Fuck – Echo Sam
via FoxyTunes

Gobsmacked

Still looking for a job. But you know the guy I used to work for? I just found out last week that he’s been diagnosed with terminal cancer.

Completely unsure how to feel at this time. I’m glad I’m deriving no satisfaction from the news, and that’s about it.

Old, old, old

While doing research for 50 Foot DVD, on the long-gone vistas of 1967, I started thinking about a few things that had some impact on the then ten-year-old me.  Of course, YouTube has it:

Yes, I owned a toy sniper rifle in its own case. There was a lot of incredibly un-fun crap going on in the late 60’s, but goddamn how I miss them sometimes.

Somehow made more poignant by last night, when my ten-year-old finally prevailed upon me to watch Alien vs Predator: Requiem, a viewing which was fraught with multiple pronouncements of “Awesome!” from him.

Here, let me spare you the incredibly spastic nature of the YouTube comments by embedding this here:

It wasn’t as awful as I’d been led to believe, but then few things are.  It was pretty much standard action movie mediocrity wrapped in a fairly large budget, and continued the first AvP movie’s pattern of a large cast of undeveloped characters about whom the viewer could not be bothered to care. The more I think about this movie, the more  I think this course of affairs deserves closer examination in that old, venerable project of mine, The Bad Movie Report… but that would also mean watching this, the first one, and Alien 3 and 4 again, and that could get ooky.

I have joked that since my son professes the original Alien vs Predator to be his favorite movie (it edged out The Empire Strikes Back), I may have to disinherit him… but then, he’s ten. And I have to ponder how my parents felt, forty years back, when yours truly watched that psychedelic Levis commercial raptly, over and over again… on a black and white set.

Was there a point?

That last post got very scattered, yes, I know. There was a point I had intended to make in there when I started writing, and it all got buried. That point was – while I was talking about the quality of the speakers in the Nintendo DS – I was struck by one instance in particular.

I’m still playing Etrian Odyssey II – Heroes of Lagaard. As you know, I’ve typified it as an old school dungeon crawl (which I lurvs), where the lower screen is used to map the dungeon as you travel through it. In this particular labyrinth, you start at the bottom and work your way up, and it has become so overgrown that it is a forest into and of itself – no stone walls or caverns. Seasons seem to change with every five levels or so, and when I got to the third stratum, where it is perpetual winter, there it was, captured with perfect fidelity, one of my favorite sounds in the world: the sound of boots crunching in snow.

Yeah, yeah, I know, you folks in the more Northern climes, like my pal Ken Begg in Chicago, are doubtless sick to freakin’ death of the sound, but as a lifelong Texan, it remains quite exotic to me. I seem to make it to Chicago every two years or so to visit snow (and Ken and B-Fest), and on the rare occasion that snow does not coat the ground… man, I miss that sound.

And since we are speaking of Etrian Odyssey II and my time-wasting activities: I finally got past the twin bosses that were giving me so much grief and continued to advance into the game. At this point, I am starting to mess with the makeup of my party, so here comes some gaming geek stuff. If you’re not interested, well, there’s some links over to the right. See ya later.

Lagaard allows a party of up to five characters, and by and large I’ve been pretty traditional in the makeup. There’s a jack-of-all trades warrior (called a “Landsknecht” here), a tank – high hit points, high defense, decent damage (called a Protector), a “War Magus”, so-so damage but some great healing and buffing magic, a dedicated healer called a Medic (fancy that) and a Gunner. Yes, a character with a gun in a fantasy game. It happens all the time. And once you start leveling a Gunner’s attacks, that character starts kicking ass without bothering to take names.

I’ve been using the War Magus as a backup healer, but that’s really only utilizing half his potential, as many of his special attacks do extra damage to targets that another character has placed a status effect upon – a monster that has been stunned, or had Sleep or Fear cast upon it.

What this means is I should be leveling up a Hexer… a character whose sole function is to cast Curses upon opponents. Yet, so far, I am not. (Though if the Hexers attacked with canes, and were called Curmudgeons, nothing would stop me from fielding a party of five of them)

Minor digression: Lagaard has some attacks, both on the player and opponent side, that “bind” various portions of the target’s body. A Bind on the head lessens accuracy and damage. A bind on the arms prevents the fancier, higher-damage-dealing attacks and magic. Bind the legs, there is no escaping (and that’s card I’ve had to play several times).

Minor digression 2: After a certain number of battles, each character is able to perform a Force Skill. If you’ve played Final Fantasy, you’ll recognize it as a Limit Break. A devastating attack that costs no points to perform. For the Gunner, it’s a Riot Gun, for the Landsknecht it’s All Out, which deals heavy damage to every target onscreen.

Now that you have that information, I can try to tell you about what is distracting me from that Hexer I seem to think I need. Cuz I’m leveling a Dark Hunter.

From the website:

“The Dark Hunters of High Lagaard are similar to those found in Etria; they can still work with either whip or sword to focus on bindings or status ailments, respectively. The key difference comes in their ability to set potentially deadly traps: in High Legaard, Dark Hunters can react to either physical or magical attacks, no matter what weapon they use.”

But wait, there’s more.

Force Skill: Bondage
Using every binding technique at its disposal, the Dark Hunter will bind an enemy’s head, arms and legs, rendering it completely incapable of acting in battle.”

Attacks that bind the opponents legs, arm and head, individually? They are called Shackles, Cuffs, and Gag. Higher attacks in the tier are named Climax and Ecstasy.

I’m leveling up a dominatrix.

The game supplies four possible portraits for each character, but I think this one says it all.

Did I mention this game is rated E – 10+ ?

I guess this may be the “Suggestive themes” alluded to in the ratings box….

God, I love Atlus Games!

EDIT: Now that I’ve gotten a chance to use it, the Dark Hunter’s Force Skill in-game is called “Dominate”, not “Bondage”, as it says on the site. I’m not sure if that’s more or less explicit…

—————-
Now playing: Haggard – Larghetto / Epilogo Adagio
via FoxyTunes

Bodies Electric

As everybody knows, I remain perpetually behind the curve. For instance, perhaps by this time next year, I will have finally seen The Dark Knight.

Which is why I am here to proclaim my love for the Nintendo DS.

Before I bought a used one a little over a month ago, I’d had very little time with one, but I distinctly recall reading the pre-release stuff and thinking, “Two screens. Huh.” And also recalling any number of NES peripherals that went unsupported and wound up on the Toys’R’Us clearance aisle. The Powerglove still looked cool, though. And dig that proto-Wii gameplay:

Time has, of course, proven me wrong, especially if the number of DS Lites I saw being pulled out while people were waiting in line at Disneyworld. Lots of kids, sure, but several adults, too.

The most remarkable thing to me – besides the actual utility of two screens – is the quality of the speakers on this dang thing. Little, tiny thin things, and they sound fabulous. At least one writer called them “surround sound”, and I scoffed… but the dimensionality of the sound coming from these things is awesome.

I picked up an affordable used copy of Final Fantasy III (the one that had gone untranslated for many years, for those keeping score). Uematsu’s music sounds very rich, even coming off a tiny chip. There are some things about modern times I wholeheartedly endorse.

Etrian Odyssey has gone by the wayside for the moment. There was sort of a story in there, but only released in small, puzzling droplets. SquarEnix excels at sort of thing, so I’ve been engrossed in FFIII’s story quite happily.

Also: when Etrian would eventually serve up a boss that ate my lunch, I would go out and grind levels until I was strong enough to take it on. In Etrian, I would think in terms of 10 levels or so. Final Fantasy, generally one is sufficient.

Viewing wise: Watched the first disc of The Wild, Wild West, Season One, and you can’t go home again. Love the steampunk spy gadgets, adore Michael Dunn as Dr. Loveless… but twice in two episodes we’ve seen Jim West turn women from the dark side by simply being Jim West and having smoldering good looks, thereby saving the day. I find I didn’t buy it with James Bond and Pussy Galore, either.

Hadn’t seen The Battle of the Bulge in many years, either, so thank you, Netflix. I liked it, but it still doesn’t beat Tora! Tora! Tora!, in my book. Though TTT seems equally crowded, it had a marvelous, semi-documentary feel. Bulge has a lot of extraneous material that could have been cut with no detriment to the story, and I really have my doubts about that final battle at the fuel depot. Still, good stuff, and it is wonderful to see the Cinerama moments, comparable to the roller coaster sequence in This is Cinerama, which did not translate at all during my first viewing on network TV, in pan-and scan. Blech.

Lastly, saw the first disc of the new version of The Andromeda Strain, which was one of my favorite movies because the science fiction is so darn hard. I had my doubts about this, as the travails of the scientists working inside the underground bunker of Project Wildfire has taken a back seat to thoroughly modern tropes like competing agendas of various government agencies (including the Office of Homeland Security, an unthinkable concept when Crichton first wrote Strain), a cocaine-addicted investigative reporter, and ground-level views of the unfolding effects of Andromeda. Taking the story largely out of the bunker has limited the pressure-cooker race against time feeling the original movie possessed, but darned if it ain’t still compelling viewing.

STATUS REPORT

Had a job interview yesterday, which would be super IF I WANTED TO SELL CARS FOR A LIVING.

Yes, I put on a tie and showed up prepared and professional. Curiosity was one part of it, but I also figured I needed the practice. Chances are, I would have been hired, since I – at the very least – have good communication skills. But – hideous hours, spent on my feet (hello, again, cane), commission-based pay, a three-day training session with an up-front fee (refunded by the dealership after 90 days, but still….) all add up to uh-uh.

Also got a call from an orthopedic clinic, for something much more similar to what I had been doing – but it was part-time and had a nice 50-mile commute.

But at least I know the resume is out there and getting some results.

This is (not) so exciting

Spent yesterday from about 8AM to Noon in traffic court. Life can get tedious when your last name is near the butt end of the alphabet. The constable was really really busy that Sunday morning in July – our docket spilled over into the next, there were so many there – and many more who did not show up.

Though I have to say, compared to other such episodes in my life, it wasn’t too bad. Though I had been warned this courthouse annex was in “a bad part of town”, it wasn’t, really, and the staff was genial. They helped make the old making-the-best-of-a-bad-thing easier, and for that, I thank them.

Phone tag with a case worker from the Texas Workforce Commission finally bore fruit today, ie., we actually talked to each other. She had a few questions about my termination. Considering that I just gave Harris County my last hundred bucks, I’m hoping this will finally result in my unemployment coming through.

I hate being desperate.

My job applications have gotten a lot more scattershot, in the hope that something will shake loose. I haven’t quite gotten to the point of applying where I’m obviously unqualified, but when you find yourself reflecting on the one month back in 1993 when you used Pagemaker, and wonder if that constitutes “experience”…

Is it any wonder I’m chewing my way through Banacek? He’s the smug, successful bastard I wanted to be when I grew up. Alas, I have only three episodes left, and then my collection will be complete, as it were. I’m finding the first season better viewing, if only because the solutions to the impossible crimes are more credible than the often rococo methods of the second season.

Also missing from season one is Carlie Kirkland, played by Christine Belford. Kirkland was another insurance investigator, and was apparently conceived as a love interest for the womanizing Banacek, but the writers could never really figure out what to do with her, at one point even marrying her off to another insurance investigator. Considering that a couple of times so far in Season One, Banacek has appeared to be pretty serious about his liaisons – the Margot Kidder character in particular – the episodic nature of the series does make the investigator seem pretty cavalier about his relationships, as none of the guest stars ever return. I can see Kirkland as a counter-balance to that – not that the womanizing and parade of hot 70s chicks ever stopped.

There. I feel better now. Holding forth on subjects absolutely nobody else cares about does that for me.

Greetings from Waterworld

Actually, if you don’t live in the Houston area, you probably missed it. Apparently the world ended today, and we were all wiped out by Eduardo.

At least, that what the media’s been trying to make us think for the last couple of days.

I saw a little rain. Nothing like the killer Allison was back a few years ago.

I’m relatively sure all this wolf-crying is going to bite us in the ass, someday. Hard.

In other schadenfreude news, you likely heard about the unencrypted laptop computer containing personal info on 33,000 customers of the “Clear” program going missing, but now it’s been found, and in the very office in which they left it. Maybe I’ve been watching too much Banacek lately, but that sure smells like a set-up to me. Just the sort of thing the wily Pole would pick up on. In between bouts of flirting with hot 70s chicks.