For the second day in a row, the temperature hit 80 degrees in Houston. No matter how many times I thump the calendar, it still claims we are in early January.
I’m glad there’s no such thing as global warming, or I’d be worried.
Why I Don’t Clean. Well, Very Often, Anyway
In the interest of that tired old chestnut, Starting The New Year Off Right, I took a gift card and a coupon and returned home with a spiffy new media shelf unit which claims to hold “360 DVDs”. It also claimed “No Tools Required”, but the first thing I saw on the instruction sheet was “Tools Required…” (No sweat. I’m male. Handy as a condemned thief under Hamurabbi’s Code, but I own many tools)
My office had suffered from Stack Syndrome for quite some time, in that incoming media was placed in boxes which then formed stacks. So I stuffed more boxes to make room to build the shelf, then emptied the boxes to place the DVDs on the shelf, while also winnowing out the massive VHS collection, ridding myself of redundant offerings and finally getting a handle on how many I still needed to transfer to DVD-R…
And now I am in the usual place I am after such a cleaning binge: whereas before, could at least point to a box where I knew something was, I now know where nothing is located, including several things I know I held in my hand during the process. Lucky my computer stayed in the same place.
Waaaah. And back to work! (whip crack)
Christmas Spectres Approaching II
I’ll resist appending”Electric Boogaloo” to the heading. No, no, no need to thank me. It was hard, but it was worth it.
Now where was I? Oh, yes, that was the basis for the post – “Where was I this last week?” Well, as much as I may bitch and moan about getting older, my father put everything in perspective by entering the hospital last week to clear out a heavily blocked carotid artery and have a stint inserted. Such procedures are no longer extraordinary, of course – good grief, they sent him home the next day – but we needed to be there to support my mom and, at my father’s insistence, “do Christmas” with them early.
Dad was in good humor for most of our visit, but kept having odd bouts of chills and fever, which had thankfully disappeared by the time we left.
But that’s not really why I sat down to write yesterday’s entry.
As mentioned earlier, we’ve been assaulted by Christmas imagery since late October. A local radio station has become “Your Official Holiday Music Station” since roughly that time, playing nothing but fa-la-la-la-al-derol. Since I am married to The Christmas Nazi, this means there has been nothing else on the car radio for the last two months, including during the drive to and from my parents.
What I discovered is that, according to this station, there are only six Christmas songs. Covered by a variety of artists, to be sure, but they are apparently the only ones worth playing:
- Winter Wonderland – the winner by a vast lead.
- Sleigh Ride
- It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas
- Feliz Navidad
- Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
- Frosty the Snowman
– strangely, almost always the Gene Autry version, though they have played a very odd version by Dean Martin
When a Christmas carol not on this list is played, the novelty value is great. Surprisingly, given the gleeful aggression of faith-based interests hammering on the “Christ is the reason for the season” trope (since they were obviously given as large a mandate as El Presidente in the last election), the non-secular music is pretty sparse, running mainly to Silent Night and The Little Drummer Boy (just to complete the Rankin-Bass holiday special trifecta). None of my favorites, like Angels We Have Heard On High, or We Three Kings. Or Bob and Doug MacKenzie’s Twelve Days of Christmas.
On the home front, I have completed the next phase in my insidious plan of slowly replacing the Christmas music CDs with stuff I can actually tolerate. Last year it was Big Band Christmas, this year it’s Los Straitjackets’ Tis the Season For…
I’ll get through this with the help of those worthies and the occasional Nat King Cole piece on Your Official Holiday Music Station. If I don’t see you again before then, a Merry Christmas to all, and Bah, Humbug, depending on your needs.
Holiday Gift Guide, Part One (and hopefully only)
Lightning Reaction – Shocking Game of Skill was found, appropriately enough, at stupid.com. Apparently one of a series, as there is a special deal if you buy Lightning Reaction along with its companion game, Shock Roulette. It’s like that video game the Bond villain had in Never Say Never Again, only horribly, horribly real.
It’s not all destructive lawsuits-waiting-to-happen, though. Stupid also sells a nifty zero blaster that will work very well in the retro SF movie I plan to make. And believe it or not, I’ve been looking for one of these for a couple of years now.
2004 Dangerous Toys List
W.A.T.C.H. world against toys causing harm, inc.
There are are at least two of these I need.
I Never Learn
Here is the newest in a long, long line of distracting, defeatist, self-destructive urges I have given into in my life.
You see, I already have two long-standing Web projects: the long-running Bad Movie Report, and I’ve been editor of Attack of the 50 Foot DVD for some time; frequently, I’m the only one writing reviews there.
But I’m also, for the first time in my life, actively making a living by writing; a six-month contract during which, in this particular phase, I am delivering a full-fledged script every three and a half days.
Needless to say, There has not been much done in the non-or-low-paying world of the movie websites. Props to fellow Webmaster The Hong Kong Cavalier for making sure 50 Foot DVD didn’t become a cobweb-site like the BMR, for which I’ve written nothing since August. Not even my usual Yearly Anniversary Column, which usually degenerated into cranky old man ravings, anyway.
Well, that’s not entirely true. I had written half of the Cranky Old Man column, but then my glorious new Gateway laptop decided to blow it’s sexy LCD monitor, and now Gateway has it in its bosom, replacing the sorry little critter. Hooray for warranties. And hooray for my old steam-driven computer, which still soldiers on bravely so I might continue to get work done. Or not, in the current case.
One of the first things in that half-formed column, besides the traditional apologies for not updating, was the sentiment, “Thank God I don’t have a blog – that would just be one more thing to not update.”
Now look at me. I have a blog.
More later. I must buy groceries.
drfreex.com 